Thanks to the queen who was busily flirting with Hells Angels and under some illusion that there was still some patriotism left with all those flags about, the journey up (for most ) seemed trouble free. So with the Jubilee celebrations in full swing and a tempting offer of whole roast pig in one village, the MMC arrived at Hollins Campsite in Eskdale. It was a grand welcome. There was a large sign all of our own and a brand new, brightly lit, toilet block in our field.

The tents arrived throughout the day and night. The family contingent engaged in a spot of "who's got the biggest tent" competition. Alex, David and baby Bea were crestfallen at the sight of the huge Johnson "hacienda" tent and were later pipped into third place by John N in the blue dome party tent.

Saturday
Saturday morning most people rose to find that wit was already in full swing to make the most of Henry's small gear oversight. Surprisingly no-one had a size 13 climbing shoe but he could always climb routes with a 2" crack for one foot and an off width crack for the other. How he laughed. Wendy’s arrival later that day also added to the "gear that would have been useful list". Who needs a sleeping bag anyway!

David had won the toss against Alix to climb on Saturday and went off with Mark W to Heron Crag in Eskdale. Their sights were set on the Hard Rock classic Gormengast E1 5a, 5a. Debbie and Steve M also wanted to do the route but after finding them dithering and whingeing opted for Side Track, a VS round the corner - a pleasant four pitch route.

Back at Gormengast, Mark arrived at the first stance. He was disturbed by the rusty peg and the lack of any high runner. He placed one average nut and a second poor nut but concluded that the stance was unsafe for a leader fall especially as the second pitch reputedly lacked any runners at all. The direct corner above was an alternative at 5b but neither Mark nor David could get up it. To cut a very long story short, Mark elected to lead pitches 1 and 2 together from the ground. The bold second pitch is a series of increasingly difficult mantelshelves and then a delicate traverse to the haven of a niche some 25ft above the last runner at the position of the first stance. Viewed from below this lead was an absolute frightener with a ground fall from 40-50ft a certainty in the event of error. Mark was appalled and said he wouldn't have started if he had known just how bad it was going to be. David followed through and led the "peach" top pitch. Some books give this route HVS - clearly a trap for the unwary.

Meanwhile Steve and Debbie returned to realise the Gorgenhast was a little harder than originally expected. They finished the day at Buckbarrow near Wasdale. After completing a pitch of an awkward off-width crack, they decided to down climb retrieving the gear as they went.

Meanwhile those who had lost the babysitting toss, namely Alix, Bea, Dean and Abby, went for a pleasant walk. They got lots of odd looks from people though, which they interpreted as "Boy, they had those two close together!".

Henry went off to Wallowbarrow crag to help set up some top ropes for Mat, Delphine, Rob, A.G, Dave Bowyer and Lucy P. He set up the ropes on two of the routes on the Far East Buttress, both VS. After these had been climbed by one and all, Henry went off with A.G and Lucy to climb Trinity Slab, a classic V. Diff which he led in his walking boots.

Ben, Rob, and John also headed out to Wallowbarrow. They met Peggy, who owns the cottage, at the start of the walk in and agreed she was a "very nice lady". Not finding anyone else to talk to, they then resigned themselves to climbing and completed Nameless V. Diff, with John leading the first pitch and Ben the second. They then did Digitation, VS with Ben leading the first pitch and John the second.

It was a beautiful day, and although the sun seemed to have been behind clouds, most managed to get sunburnt. Wallowbarrow Crag proved to be a stunning valley with spectacular views.

Niki and Rick had a rather long day (9AM-11.30PM) at Esk Buttress. They did Grand Slam (E1 5b) and Bridge's Route (HS) in superb weather, and also spent a lot of time faffing trying to get through the heathery scrambles at the foot of the routes, which was partly responsible for the late finish (Esk Buttress also has a 2 hour walk-in). Definitely worth it though, they felt, as Esk Buttress is one of the best crags in the country.

Andrew, Gerald, Rosie, Sarah G, Jackie plus lodger, John, Chris, Su and Lucy opted for Scafell and Scafell Pike via Burnmore Tarn. In truly organised fashion the party stumbled up the valley straight into the farmer's field. For some reason he seemed a little concerned about their route and took great pains to warn them about the dangers of the Lords Rake and fog. Ye of little faith. Little did he know they had Gerald the Scoutmaster at the helm and the enthusiasm of our man Andy in the pink shirt. They left Jackie and her lodger at the tarn to reach Scafell in at least 2 hours! They then negotiated the route down but still needed to get up Scafell Pike via Broad Stand and it was late. Andy's enthusiasm got the better of him-"no point in going up another mountain" so he left them to reach the summit. The route followed Litlle Narrowcote via Braod Crag and then it was slow wander back along the river valley- a sunny evening with the whole place to themselves. The day finished with dinner in the Woolpack. After a strangely surreal wander back in the light at 10.00pm, the team met up with the others in the local.

Sunday
The forecast was not good.

Climbers Kate and Steve tried in vain to beat the rain and opted for a walk around Langdale horseshoe instead.

Another group - Lucy, Tara, Rosie, and Kathrina - didn’t bother to battle the elements but watched the footie instead. Ben gave into football fever as well, but did try to climb later before rain stopped play. He then went for a walk with Rob, Rick and Niki.

Tom, Eileen and baby Nimah went to Muncaster Castle While Henry, Hilary, John B, Zoe, Sara G, Dave B, and Kate C did a walk close to Wasdale head. They went up Black Sailpass, across to Pillar via the alternative route, across to Steeple,and then back towards Wasdale by the ridge that led to Yewbarrow and back down to the lake. A brilliant route that Hilary had worked out all by herself until she gave the Trail magazine reference away. While there were showers, a touch of hail and thunder, the glimpses of sun and high cloud gave good views of Ennerdale and the lakes beyond.

Alix and Dean walked for two hours into a crag to do a classic climb (Bridges Route – HS). It started pouring partway in and they stood around at the bottom mournfully for a bit but decided as it obviously wasn’t getting any better, they'd walked out. (I'd check up on the toss next time guys! -ed)

Monday
Still raining - It was breakfast in the pub for most. Then some bottled to miss out on a fab end to the day.

Tom, Steve, John H, John N, Zoe, Tony, Tara, Ben, Rick and Nikki attempted to find solace at the climbing wall in Kendal, which was closed. This was particularly disappointing for Zoe, who together with various others had failed to drive her car out of the campsite field, it now being so waterlogged and muddy by the entrance, and finally had to resort to it being towed out by the campsite owner's Land Rover. They then had made the trip to the wall in a car caked with mud from top to toe, including inside after the window had been left open when the campsite owner had given it a try. After a very long drive Tara, AG and Zoe got a text that the wall was closed and that the others had headed to Rosthwaite in Borrowdale! So off there they headed with Tara and Zoe finally collapsing into a teashop while AG set off to try and find them. After much tea and cake, AG returned having been unsuccessful and the three of them headed off for a very pleasant 1.5hr walk along the river in the now glorious sunshine. They finally returned to the campsite after 6hrs of driving!

Steve M and Tom went on to Castle Rock (Thirlmere) to climb Overhanging Bastion (VS). The first pitch was like the Hanging Gardens of Babylon and the second pitch was extremely wet, more like climbing Angel Falls. However the top pitches were in immaculate condition.

Later the two Johns and Kate found evening sanctuary with a Chinese and fine views of Sellafield and a broken telephone box.

The bumbly walkers: Sarah, Gerald, Andrew, Jackie, John, Rob, Lucy and Margaret opted for the waterfall route. It was 150ft in full glory surrounded in lush tropical moss and ferns. Lunch was hampered by midges and the way back an obstacle course in bog avoidance but the reward was the second visit to the pub for a beer in blazing sun.

The more serious group - John B, Rosie and Henry - decided to march off up upper Eskdale towards Bowfell and see what could be done in the rain. They set off at a good pace, but started up Bowfell in rain and soon found themselves getting increasingly wet. It was a bleak sop for lunch near the summit. After reaching the top of Bowfell, they headed down towards the Ore Gap in a bit of hill fog, which was underestimated somewhat. Bowfell Buttress came a little too close but after getting out the compass they soon got back on route and found the path and plenty of cairns from then on. On the way down from Bowfell the miracle occurred - there was a glimpse of the back edge of the clouds and a glimmer of the sun. Sure enough, as they headed up Scafell Pike the clouds departed and left them to complete Scafell, then take Lord’s Rake to Scafell Pike and head back down to Eskdale for a well-earned lemonade or two.

Rick and Niki headed home, but stopped off at Trowbarrow Quarry (near Lancaster) where Niki led the classic VS Jean Jeanie.

Tuesday
For the majority it was time to pack up and go home.

For those who remained it was a repeat trip to the waterfall where apparently Eileen fell into a bog up to her waist with the day finishing at the Eskdale fete in glorious sunshine.

Zoe went climbing with John N, John H, and AG at Wallowbarrow. John N and Zoe did a lovely VS called Digitation and then sat and enjoyed the sun before they headed home.

Dave and Jude never quite managed to link up with the MMC in Wasdale as they were in Hawkshead celebrating Dave's mum's 70th and found it difficult to get away. However, they were allowed out onto the rock briefly on Raven Crag in Langdale (and in between breast-feeding Erin) to climb two multi-pitch Severes Evening Wall and Oak Tree Wall - both rather jolly two star affairs. Somehow they managed to increase the faff-factor on Evening Wall by getting a bit lost and taking four pitches to do 47m.

So in the end the water flooded the Johns’ tent and scared away the lightweights. The animals got into Tony's food and slugs found a home in Sarah's backpack. The weather was a little disappointing for some but overall it was a pleasant way to spend a long weekend. And as for the football..