Why is it increasingly difficult to feed anybody? The days of having someone round for dinner and simply presenting them with a plate of meat and two veg are long gone. Expecting people to eat what you have prepared without checking their dietary requirements is almost as big a social faux-pas as supporting the war in Iraq. In the past vegetarians were considered (and considered themselves) to be mildly eccentric and so would be embarrassed about putting out their host by demanding something special. Now vegetarianism is firmly in the mainstream and it is the meat-eaters who have to justify themselves, this allows the radishes to feel aggrieved if their needs are not catered for.

I am not talking here about people who have specific dietary requirements for medical or religious grounds. I have an Asian friend who has been vegetarian since birth and once tried a piece of meat. He described it as the most disgusting thing he had ever tasted and significant amount would have no doubt played havoc with his digestive system. Similarly people with a medical condition (eg gluten intolerance) have no choice but to adjust their diet as certain foods can be dangerous for them, though their do seem to be a lot more of them these days. When were nut allergies invented? No one had them when I was growing up.

The vast majority of picky eaters are simply that by lifestyle choice. These are people who happily munched their way through piles of processed meat as kids but at some point in their life had a Damascene revelation and swore off the flesh. This is not the place for lengthy discourse as to the benefits and morals of vegetarianism as vast tomes have been and will be written about it elsewhere. Rather it is an examination of the social shift that has brought them in from the margins of society to become the mainstream.

Years ago vegetarianism was consider totally eccentric. George Orwell famously talked about "sandal-wearing vegetarian socialists" in tones of mild distain. The point being that at that time (in the 1930's) it really was quite noteworthy to be a vegetarian and was considered somewhat dubious and untrustworthy. To announce yourself as a vegetarian was a political rejection of the mainstream and you were seen as being deliberately awkward.

These days the situation is completely reversed and making assumptions that someone is not a vegetarian is considered very rude. Never mind that the "vegetarian" eats poultry, fish and dairy products, present them with a piece of beautifully prepared meat and you are suddenly considered beyond the pale. When your guest enquires as to what you have prepared for them and they find out it is meat they are suddenly shocked into a grave announcement. They will say "I can't eat meat" or "I don't eat meat", never the more accurate "I won't eat meat". This statement is made with such utter finality with a look of game set and match that it does not lend itself to any further debate. The statement is made. Case closed. Period. Trying to discuss this matter is pointless. Never mind that they are looking thin, pale, anaemic and listless and decent cut of beef appears to be just what they need, they will not bend. Even a suggestion that they just leave the meat and eat the rest of the food is not greeted favourably. The mere proximity of the meat to their plate seems to offend them.

Faced with such an impasse the host is forced to rustle up an omelette or similar (having checked that they are ovo-tolerant first) or else the vegetarian will sit there at dinner picking at a radish and looking hurt.

So, you say, the vegetarian should have told the host about their dietary requirements first. But where does this lead? Either the host prepares a separate meal for the vegetarian thus putting themselves to considerably more trouble or else the communal meal is all vegetarian. This means that the vegetarian has managed to impose their lifestyle on the rest of the party, not really a very considerate situation. Of course this has known to be exploited by some people. A friend of mine delights in having a nominal vegetarian at a dinner party as it mean he doesn't have to shell out for any expensive meat.

The interesting thing is why non vegetarians seems to tolerate this situation and meekly accept being put out. If you had a guest who would only eat bacon sandwiches out of choice to the exclusion of all other food, and thus you altered the menu to have nothing but bacon sandwiches it would be considered very strange. The person in question would rightly be treated as an awkward sod who did not deserve to be indulged. So why do vegetarians get away with it? I stress again that I am not talking about people who avoid meat for medical or religious reason but simply for personal reasons. The answer I think is that vegetarians have subtly managed to inculcate the rest of us with the notion that meat is somehow morally bad. Thus in declaring their vegetarianism they have immediately taken the moral high ground and any suggestion that they should eat meat is morally corrupting.

Furthermore the moral high ground having been taken, there is an implication that even eating meat in front of a vegetarian is somehow corrupting and so in order to level the moral playing field the only solution is for everyone to have a vegetarian meal.

This phenomenon is especially noticeable on climbing trips where the cooking is done outdoors. In these situations when people group together there are normally only two or three stoves to cook on. Also the preparation of the food has to be relatively simple and quick to hence the tendency to past and sauce. With one stove cooking the pasta there is only really one pot left for the sauce and hence everyone has to eat the same thing. Also the sauce tends to absorb all manner of vegetables and adding meat in "that the vegetarian can pick out" is not rally a practical option. This really explains why we all eat such volumes of pasta slop when camping.

This does however put me in mind of one incident a couple of years ago in El Chorro. Six of us, well peppered with vegetarians, were having a big pasta slop cook-up in the bleak and chilly campsite. Idly looking at the ingredients list of one can of beans that had been added I noticed that it actually beans and other stuff. The other stuff being low grade chorizo and similar processed meat products. Amazingly the vegetarians didn't notice and apparently had no ill effects.

One final thought though. Why are there so many vegetarian products masquerading as meat products? Vegetarian bacon, burgers, roasts and chicken abound, all looking incredibly unnatural and dubious. If you have a look at the packets shown below I refuse to believe that there contents are any more natural or healthy than a cut of meat from a beast that has looked over a gate with the sun shining on its back. You will note that the manuafacturer of this product is a company called (no doubt without a trace of irony) Realeat (sic) ! Well mum may well have gone to Iceland but if she comes back with baskets of this stuff she's gone bonkers too.

Iceman